Setsunakutemo Zutto
by rhygell
Summary: [Yaoi] Even though it's always painful ... Another companion fic, alternate ending to Cross. Naruto tells his side of the story. [NaruNeji, NaruSasu]


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A/N:** I've been planning on another Cross sequel. The reviews that I received were mostly, "Aww, poor Sasuke." (except for the person who said, "Ah, poor Neji, he cried because he saw what happened." I am pawned by said person.) So, let's try yet another approach, shall we? (ignores impending RL commitments for the next hour or so ...) 

**Reminder:** Like "And I Cry", this is **NOT** what truly happened after Cross (which is, as of now, open-ended). I repeat, this is **NOT** what truly happens after "Cross". This is just a companion fic. Just a _"what if it wasn't what I thought it was"_ continuation.

**Disclaimer:** Kishimoto Masashi owns Naruto. Please don't kill Asuma. Or pair Genma with anyone. Please? I own Haku's nail polish, but that's all. The song is a Tasuki image song. Imagine Kabuto singing. Fwooooosh.

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**Setsunakuttemo Zutto**

Kakashi watched Naruto trace a Hidden Village symbol on his ANBU mask with two fingers. Kiri. Ever since he started recounting the relevant events of last night and the better half of the morning, now was the only time he paused.

He was damaging the mask unknowingly. He was wondering if he should take it away when the blond placed it on the table between them, without really seeing it.

Kakashi took a sip of his tea. The pause had gone on long enough. "And then ..." he prodded gently. The story consisted mostly of that phrase. And then ... And then ... And then. After Sakura's party, they stayed the night in Sakura's new apartment. And then ... And then ... And then.

"And then," Naruto echoed, "After I apologized, I told him I'll talk to him today." It hurt to look at the cynical smile on his face. "I didn't know what shocked him more – that I was amateur enough to mistake him for Neji, or that we're ..." He held up his right pinky, then shrugged. "Maybe it was the Haku comment."

He barely restrained himself from asking questions then and there. The blond must have sensed it, too, but he only shook his head and continued. "Aside from you, I think Sasuke's the only one who understands me and Haku. Iruka-sensei ... he wasn't there."

Kakashi nodded to all of this. He had been busy contending with Zabuza, but how Naruto had acted as he lay dead on the bridge was an explanation enough; not to mention his somberness before they took their leave of Tazuna and his family.

"Sasuke asked," his voice a lower whisper, "when Neji and I ... How can I answer? After our fight in the Chuunin Finals, there was something ... when Sasuke went to Orochimaru of his own accord ... when I was waiting for ero-sennin to train me ... when I came back to Konoha ... when I saw Sasuke again after two and a half years ... when I was training, I realized that all this time ..." Blue eyes were on the discarded mask on the table. "All this time, Neji was there."

Silence. When a respectful interval had passed, Kakashi spoke. "And you told Sasuke so." When the blond nodded, he smiled. Finally, his patience would be rewarded, if just by a bit. The blond looked dead on his seat. He could wait until tomorrow, maybe, but this question couldn't. "Naruto, tell me. Was it on purpose?"

"No. It was an honest mistake on my part." The blond was an exceptional liar at times, but Kakashi had grown up with Obito and the Yondaime. He could only guess at Sasuke's frustration at being unable to know whether Naruto was lying or not – for surely, he would have asked the same question as he did.

He wasn't lying.

As far as he knew, they don't lie – not when it counts.

"Would you have told him?" The silver-haired jounin could have smiled at the shock on the blond's face.

Naruto only shook his head. "Like student like teacher ...?" He sighed. "I would have told him. Eventually."

Kakashi resisted the urge to raise an eyebrow. "Eventually. Hmmm. Sasuke's the only one left."

The blond held up a hand, as if to say that he was already aware of this. "Of course I wanted to tell him – I don't know if it's to give him a chance to say no or ... I don't know! But ... But it's so unfair to Neji." Naruto's tears had always been shallow. They were spilling onto his cheeks now. "What I'm feeling, about us, about Sasuke. All of it." He gulped the cool tea, running one hand through his disheveled hair. "I love Neji. Sasuke's my best friend. That's clear. Or have I confused them?" Ah, the azure of despair indeed. "Should Neji be my best friend? And Sasuke ... was he ...?"

Iruka had just walked in the room. When he saw that Naruto was crying, he came over immediately, opening his arms in a soothing embrace.

Brown eyes met black. He nodded. Of course Kakashi knew that he and Iruka shouldn't interfere. Naruto needed self-searching.

"You need to rest," Iruka was saying as he led the unresisting blond to the futon. "You haven't had any real rest since yesterday afternoon."

"Arigatou, Iruka-sensei, Kakashi-sensei." He smiled softly. "Tanomu tte ba yo."

Of course. He moved closer, raising his slanted forehead protector as he did. Dreamless sleep. Naruto slumped bonelessly on the futon. Iruka fussed over him until he was satisfied.

"Well?" The Chuunin raised an eyebrow.

Kakashi took a deep breath. "Well, this is what I think we should do ..."

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A/N:** So this time, it's Naruto who cries his eyes out (and who cried that single tear the night before. Rar.) Please tell me what you think. 


End file.
